Here Are 70 Of The Best And Most Memorable Quotes From "Friends" (2025)

I recently read that there are a total of over 5,200 minutes of Friends episodes. In other words, just shy of 87 hours — or 236 episodes, or 10 seasons. That's a lot of opportunities for standout quotes, of which there are MANY. So here are just some of them: 1. "Oh... my... God!" 2. "I don't want my baby's first words to be 'How you doin'?'" 3. "Guys can fake it? Unbelievable! The one thing that's ours!" 4. "Three failed marriages, two illegitimate children... The personal ad writes itself." 5. "First divorce: wife's hidden sexuality, not my fault. Second divorce: said the wrong name at the altar, kind of my fault. Third divorce: they shouldn't let you get married when you're that drunk and have stuff drawn all over your face, Nevada's fault." 6. "I thought it'd be great, you know? Have some time alone with my thoughts... turns out I don't have as many thoughts as you'd think." 7. "Chandler still thinks I'm pregnant and he hasn't asked me how I'm feeling or offered to carry my bags. I feel bad for the woman who ends up with him." 8. "Joey ate my last stick of gum, so I killed him. Do you think that was wrong?" 9. "I may play the fool at times, but I'm a little more than just a pretty blonde girl with an ass that won't quit." 10. "I can handle this. 'Handle' is my middle name. Actually, 'handle' is the middle of my first name." 11. "I can't believe my parents are actually pressuring me to find one of you people." 12. "I thought a gynecologist would have no trouble dating women." 13. "Well, given that he's desperately in love with you, he probably wouldn't mind getting a cup of coffee or something." 14. "Oh, come on tell me. I could use another reason why women won't look at me." 15. "There are babies coming into the world in this very building and your negative fighting noises are not the first thing they should hear!" 16. "You're like my best friend in the world, except for maybe Lori Schafer, who I don't talk to anymore because she's all bitter now that she lost the weight and it turns out she doesn't have a pretty face." 17. “Welcome to the real world!" 18. “It’s not even for me!” 19. “WE WERE ON A BREAK!” 20. “Gum would be perfection." 21. “Could I be wearing any more clothes?” 22. “She’s your lobster.” 23. “Don’t be in one.” 24. “Spit-on-your-neck fantastic.” 25. “MY SANDWICH?!” 26. "Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?" 27. "Well, the fridge broke, so I had to eat everything." 28. “A girl’s gotta eat.” 29. "Remember, if I am harsh with you, it is only because you’re doing it wrong." 30. “You’re a shoe!” 31. “Unagi.” 32. "That’s a great story. Can I eat it?" 33. "I've missed the last twelve-hundred times." 34. "I wish I could, but I don’t want to." 35. “Why didn’t you make a copy?” 36. “Does she have a wedding dress?” 37. “She is just my wife.” 38. "A great deal of sweating." 39. “I don’t hang up on your friends.” 40. “‘Hold me closer, Tony Danza.’” 41. "Damn the jellyfish. Damn all the jellyfish!" 42. “No more falafel.” 43. “Who's FICA? "Why's he getting all my money?" 44. “My diamond shoes are too tight!’” 45. “I’d pee on any one of you!” 46. “They don’t know.” 47. “I think I could show this cake a good time.” 48. “Why do they have to become people?” 49. “Say the right name.” 50. "I like…maintaining you.” 51. “JOEY DOESN'T SHARE FOOD!” 52. "Meet Princess Consuela Banana Hammock." 53. “Still talking!” 54. “Decisions.” 55. “PIVOT!” 56. “SHUT UP!” 57. "A moo point." 58. "A no-sex pact, huh? I actually have one of those going on with every woman in America." 59. “We must alert the church elders!” 60. "I wasn’t supposed to put beef in the trifle!" 61. “Just be yourself.” 62. "Until the age of 25, I thought the only response to 'I love you' was 'Oh, crap.'" 63. “Naked Thursdays.” 64. “This is for life.” 65. “I know!” 66. “NOOOOOOOOOO.” 67. “How you doin’?” 68. "Tastes like feet." 69. “Smelly cat, smelly cat.” 70. "I make jokes when I'm uncomfortable." Was your favorite quote on the list? If not, sound off in the comments! Watch Once Upon A Time In Londongrad from BuzzFeed Studios, a new true crime docuseries based on the explosive BuzzFeed News investigation, now streaming on Peacock. References